Unless they involve Lindsay Lohan, DUIs rarely make it to the news; however one non-celebrity made it to the drunk-tank hall-of-shame after wrecking his motorized bar stool. Yes, you read that correctly - motorized bar stool.
Kile Wygle, who was hospitalized for minor injuries, had drank approximately 15 beers and was zooming his little pub friendly go-kart while intoxicated. The 28-year-old Ohio man fashioned the ultimate pub-crawling device by using an old lawnmower, steering wheel, and prime bar seating. The contraption was capable of hauling at a respectable 38 MPH, and was a sure hit among all the Ohio alcoholic women. Police released the 911 tapes of the exchange between a witness and the dispatcher: “I got a friend who wrecked a bar stool,” the caller said. The dispatcher then asked if he fell and hit his head on the bar “Um, no, he was riding the bar stool … a motorized bar stool.” The part of the 911 call not recorded was when the dispatcher gave Kile mad props asked where he can pick up one of his own.
While we never condone drunk driving, we’ve got to give this guy points for creativity. It’s a sweet thing to imagine… a crowded bar, standing room only. The saloon style double doors swing open, and dramatic 80’s music video style fog filters into the room. Behind the wall of smoke, a lone figure’s silhouette emerges in the doorway. There’s a momentary pause and then he zooms his little lawnmower up to the crowded bar and says, “gimme a Bud Light. No wait, I’ll take two.” Badass.
