In a move no one could have possibly seen coming, Bristol Palin and her baby’s daddy Levi “Jeans” Johnston have called it quits. The parents of Tripp Clawhammer Marmaduke Palin had a good run, but in the end marriage just didn’t seem to be in the cards for the young opponents of abstinence.
No official word has been given as to why the split occurred, but experts and non-experts alike are speculating that they really never wanted to get married in the first place. In the meantime, Levi will continue to struggle with working in the oil fields and taking care of his kid, but it’s worth noting that with his semi-newfound celebrity he could probably snag a part in a reality show. Bachelorette: Alaska, anyone? Meanwhile, the collapse of family values seems to put a dent in Hot Grandma Palin’s presidential hopes. How will a hungry nation of lustful conservatives react to the collapse of her family’s values. Only time will tell. Tripp in 2044!
