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Posts Tagged ‘International News’

Finland Delivers Broadband and Sunshine

10/14/09 - Posted by Abdullah Saeed under International Affairs

We often view the use of new technology as a privilege. Hell, we still say having a driver’s license is a privilege in a country where functioning without a car is  practically impossible outside of a city. However, one country is taking the first step in recognizing that we live in an age of dependence on technology, not simply a time of increased ease. Today, Finland makes broadband a legal right, and the approximate 20 resulting Tweets per minute suggest that it’s a damn good idea.
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“Survivor” Contestant Dies During Filming

6/01/09 - Posted by Evan Kessler under International Affairs

Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. Subjecting relatively normal human beings to extreme physical challenges in ridiculous, nutrition deprived conditions as they desperately make alliances can’t always end in champagne wishes and caviar dreams. Sure, it all sounds entertaining and harmless, but as the popular saying goes, “it’s all fun and games until someone has a heart attack and dies.”

That is exactly what happened on the set of a reality show that unfortunately wasn’t VH1’s “I Love Money”. Noncho Vodenicharov, a 53-year old former stuntman, singer, and Mayor had the utter misfortune to lose his life during the filming of Bulgaria’s version of the popular reality show Survivor.

“It’s all fun and games until someone has a heart attack and dies.”

While details are a bit fuzzy, odds are the victim had just finished swimming three miles after days of little nourishment and/or sleep in attempts to win immunity to save all of the members of his alliance from being voted off. With Noncho’s passing, no one is quite sure who will be booted at the next tribal council meeting, since Vodenicharov had totally promised everyone he had their backs. For more information on this story… watch this youtube clip and learn to speak Bulgarian.

Shoot ‘em Up: Two Men Charged with Injecting HIV

11/13/08 - Posted by Carmel Hagen under Health

Two (horrible, appalling, extremely hell-bound) Dutch men have been charged with injecting 14 victims with HIV.

The actions of Peter M. and Hans J. (full names not released according to Dutch law) can not be interpreted as attempted murder due to the Dutch court’s ruling that HIV is only a chronic illness, not a decidedly fatal one (Ed note: OH: that’s crap). Because the men were willingly participating in unprotected orgies, the origins of the victims’ HIV can also not be proven. (Ed note: OH: Slightly more understandable crap, but still crap)

The men will serve 9 and 5 years, respectively. This hardly amounts for the amount of cumulative lifespan they’ve probably whacked off their sex party friends’ lives, but the nature of their crime probably guarantees an even rougher time in prison.

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  • The Heirs To Uga VII’s Throne

    11/20/09

    The Story: With the passing of Georgia’s beloved bulldog icon, a new master-mascot must be chosen.  Who will it be?
    The Search: Uga VII
    Some of us are born into greatness and some have it unexpectedly thrust upon us and never learn to deal with it, leading us to end up in rehab.  You can count the [...]

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  • Johnny Depp Brings the Sex

    11/18/09

    The Story: Johnny Depp was named the sexiest man alive according to People magazine.  But is he man enough for this title?
    The Search: Sexy Johnny Depp
    I’m a man, and I find men disgusting. I look at other men, and the last adjective that comes to mind is ’sexy’. However, I can’t deny that among the [...]

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  • Appropriate Publicity Techniques

    11/12/09

    The Story: Carrie Prejean became extremely flustered while on-air with Larry King.  OneRiot breaks down her interviewing tactics, and helps her further her public speaking skills.

    The Search: Larry King & Carrie Prejean
    With all the pseudo-celebrities emerging over the past decade or so, we at OneRiot have grown increasingly concerned that people are getting famous for [...]

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  • The Galactic Search for Love

    11/11/09

    The Story: Diaper-wearing Astronaut Lisa Nowak was sentenced today for her cross-country crime.  OneRiot casts the movie featuring the out of this world love triangle.
    The Search: Lisa Nowak Sentence
    Astronaut love is not like regular person love. Maybe that’s why the 2004 story of Lisa Nowak and the space-love triangle that caused her to drive 1000 [...]

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  • Renaming Mel Gibson’s Octo-Spawn

    11/03/09

    The Summary: Mel Gibson becomes a father of eight children - and OneRiot renames them all.
    The Search: Mel Gibson’s Baby
    Everyone loves when celebrities have babies, because the names they grace them with offer solid proof that they operate on a whole different plane of existence. However, the latest celebrity couple to a offer a up [...]

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