Search the realtime web - the news, stories and videos people are talking about right now.

Posts Tagged ‘Stampedes’

What Kind Of Training? Wal-mart Training, Sir.

12/02/08 - Posted by Evan Kessler under US

Here’s a riddle for ya: What’s completely intangible and believed to be capable of stopping two thousand crazed “Black Friday” bargain hunters?

…Give up?

Training. That’s the answer according to the lawyer for the family of the Mineola, Long Island Wal-mart employee trampled this past week amidst the rush of rabid consumers.

Jdimytai Damour was 6 feet 5 and 270 pounds, and was thus placed in front of the store, despite working there only a week and never having been trained in crowd control. Damour subsequently died from asphyxiation as the hopelessly greedy and unruly mob of consumers ran him over en route to getting the great deals and low, low prices on items ranging from Big Screen TVs to Wal-mart-exclusive apparel. While a little crowd handling ability may have aided the situation a tad more favorably, it’s a giant leap of faith to bet that any customers willing to break down electronic doors in pursuit of capitalistic bliss would really be quelled by a large body, a smiling face, not to mention a simple request to carry out their shopping in a more orderly fashion.

Shopping Gets Gnarly This Holiday Season

12/01/08 - Posted by Evan Kessler under US

Wal-mart employees trampled to death; shootings at Toys ‘R’ Us; hold-ups at a Miami mall: signs of the Apocalypse or merely scientific proof that humans evolved from more animalistic brethren? Neither, ’tis just the start of gift-giving season in the United States of America.

This past Friday, despite a flagging economy, consumers attempted to beat the swarms en route to a new X-Box 360 or nose hair trimmer. Shoppers lined up outside many a store to ensure that they wouldn’t be buying goodies for those they hold dear at the last minute, and stormed the opening times with such intensity that a life was taken in the process.

Retailers noted day after Thanksgiving crowds were slightly smaller than in recent years, and that most shops relied on hefty discounts to entice the thinning herd into buying everything from dollhouses to big screen TVs. While the cut-rates led to a surprising 3% increase in Black Friday sales from last year, the consumer tendency to go for on-sale items left much to be desired in the area of profit margin.

This year’s early shopping frenzy was marked less by focus on must-have items like Wii Fit and Elmo Live and more on practical, less extravagant items like mouthwash and bindles. Customers chose to
stay within their budget rather than splurge. However, many retailers seem optimistic about their profit prospects while tempering lower expectations after the modest beginning to the shopping season. The
good news is, for anyone that didn’t break an arm or leg in the initial surge for savings, you still have about a month to get something for someone you want to convince that you care for.

Partnership

Recent Comments

Gossip

  • The Heirs To Uga VII’s Throne

    11/20/09

    The Story: With the passing of Georgia’s beloved bulldog icon, a new master-mascot must be chosen.  Who will it be?
    The Search: Uga VII
    Some of us are born into greatness and some have it unexpectedly thrust upon us and never learn to deal with it, leading us to end up in rehab.  You can count the [...]

    read more…

  • Johnny Depp Brings the Sex

    11/18/09

    The Story: Johnny Depp was named the sexiest man alive according to People magazine.  But is he man enough for this title?
    The Search: Sexy Johnny Depp
    I’m a man, and I find men disgusting. I look at other men, and the last adjective that comes to mind is ’sexy’. However, I can’t deny that among the [...]

    read more…

  • Appropriate Publicity Techniques

    11/12/09

    The Story: Carrie Prejean became extremely flustered while on-air with Larry King.  OneRiot breaks down her interviewing tactics, and helps her further her public speaking skills.

    The Search: Larry King & Carrie Prejean
    With all the pseudo-celebrities emerging over the past decade or so, we at OneRiot have grown increasingly concerned that people are getting famous for [...]

    read more…

  • The Galactic Search for Love

    11/11/09

    The Story: Diaper-wearing Astronaut Lisa Nowak was sentenced today for her cross-country crime.  OneRiot casts the movie featuring the out of this world love triangle.
    The Search: Lisa Nowak Sentence
    Astronaut love is not like regular person love. Maybe that’s why the 2004 story of Lisa Nowak and the space-love triangle that caused her to drive 1000 [...]

    read more…

  • Renaming Mel Gibson’s Octo-Spawn

    11/03/09

    The Summary: Mel Gibson becomes a father of eight children - and OneRiot renames them all.
    The Search: Mel Gibson’s Baby
    Everyone loves when celebrities have babies, because the names they grace them with offer solid proof that they operate on a whole different plane of existence. However, the latest celebrity couple to a offer a up [...]

    read more…

Updates

Partnership

Stuff We’re Watching

  • http://www.vimeo.com/7235817
  • http://www.vimeo.com/6958283
  • http://www.vimeo.com/6788487

Tweet Tweet

    more tweets
     

    You need to log in to vote

    The blog owner requires users to be logged in to be able to vote for this post.

    Alternatively, if you do not have an account yet you can create one here.

    Powered by Vote It Up