In the late 70’s/early 80’s, the only way to tell hundred of strangers entirely too much unimportant information about yourself while avoiding conversation altogether was via vanity plate. This innovation alerted fellow drivers that the douchebag with clearly no regard for directionals was also an extremely proud dentist, as witnessed by the words “ToothDR” emblazoned on the back of his Beemer. It also proved surprisingly helpful to police when tracking down hit and run suspects. Even though there are now thousands of ways in which you can overtly brag about your life choices - most notably, Twitter - some people still choose to use the back of their car to let other people know how great they are.
One such recent attempted declaration of smugness was thankfully declined by Colorado’s Department of Motor Vehicles. Kelly Coffman-Lee, a proud vegan woman, decided to put her “I’m better than you because I don’t eat meat” point of view on display by requesting a plate containing the message “ILUVTOFU.” The state did her a huge favor in denying her request, as she and her family would’ve almost certainly been the targets of endless ridicule whilst riding around in the car with such a message on their vehicle. Still the woman insists that she should be able to get her plate even if she wouldn’t actually love to FU, though she would probably have no objections with inviting you over to Tofurkey.
In a related story, the head of the New Jersey tourism board was also denied a plate when that state’s DMV was offended by her declaration to other drivers that she might “See You In Teaneck.” Put it together.









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