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Posts Tagged ‘TV’

What (We Think) You’ll Find on Lost

1/13/10 - Posted by Abdullah Saeed under Hot Topics

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The Story: What kind of twists are the creators of Lost going to throw at us this season?  We’ve got a few guesses.

The Search: LOST Season 6 ABC

American network TV has a method of ensuring that all programs broadcast are quality and stay quality. That’s why terribly written shows like Freaks and Geeks and Arrested Development get canceled and completely original shows like Glee see instant renewal. As long as the people are watching, the show must go on, and nothing keeps people watching like absolute bewilderment (something the public has been addicted to since the rise of 24 hour political news coverage). That’s why the writers of Lost have been scrambling to keep your attention with enough plot twists to choke a smoke monster. With the upcoming sixth season reportedly containing the densest story lines yet, we at OneRiot have started placing bets on occurrences.

It is all Hurley’s dream
This explanation popped up in season 2, episode 18 and never really got much attention, considering it’s probably the most plausible twist the show has come up with. That’s right, the ‘it was all a dream’ gimmick beats out any of the island’s inexplicable logic. The problem with the island is the same problem atheists have with the scriptural god: if it’s so mysterious and powerful, then why  is it so emotional? An island that transcends time and space probably shouldn’t care about which whiny humans are actually living on it, and likely wouldn’t bend things around in the real world to get the ones who left back. I mean, why did it want Ben back? That guy sucks. Odds: 8 to 1. (more…)

Go Away Jay

1/08/10 - Posted by Abdullah Saeed under Hot Topics

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The Story: While you had a good run Jay, here are some other forms of entertainment we’d rather watch.

The Search: Leno O’Brien

When we heard that Conan was going to be taking over the Tonight Show, we looked forward to a well-deserved bump up for the former Late Night host, and a graceful farewell to the man who held the 11:30 slot for nearly two decades. We forgot that network TV has very little to do with class, and a lot more to do with stacks and stacks of ratings. Instead of retiring to enjoy his millions of dollars and fine collection of antique cars, Leno clung to the opiate that is TV fame as NBC obliged him with a 10 pm time slot and a brand new show. Now that the experiment is failing, the network is considering moving him back to the 11:30 slot. What about Conan O’Brien? What about the 11 o’clock news? What about Jimmy Fal…yknow what? We wouldn’t mind if you canceled him. But there are a few things we’d rather watch than Jay Leno’s massive head.

Sitcom for an SNL star
We’re not sure how the last decade of god awful Saturday Night Live shows got Tina Fey and Amy Poehler their own shows, but it totally worked out. Both managed successful, if a bit formulaic, sitcom type series. Though it might cost a little more, we’re confident that such a show would be well received. Andy Samberg, anyone? (more…)

The Simpsons 450th Episode: Leaving The Shark In Its Wake

1/04/10 - Posted by Evan Kessler under Hot Topics

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The Story: While we’ve been entertained, it may be time for some shows to wrap up their series…for good.

The Search: Simpsons Episode

In 2009 “The Simpsons” outlasted “Gunsmoke” to become TV’s longest-running scripted nighttime series.  Still churning out episodes twenty years after its initial airdate on December 17,1989; the show has spawned an entire generation of people whose only point of humorous reference is to cite episodes of “The Simpsons.”  While many of the show’s die-hard fans maintain a near-religious devotion to their Sunday night ritual that is keeping up with Marge, Homer, Bart, and Lisa; the more sensible TV viewer can confidently state that this animated dynamo has only been sporadically funny over the past ten years or so and has more than likely overstayed its welcome in the Sunday night lineup. In celebration of the show’s 450th episode slated to air this Sunday, followed by a 20th anniversary special, we would like to take this opportunity look at a few other shows currently taking up space in the lineup that should probably go quietly into that sweet night.

screen-shot-2010-01-04-at-14833-pmThe Jay Leno Show-Jay Leno had a pretty nice run as the host of The Tonight Show, but with flailing ratings away from spotlight previously made famous by Steve Allen, Jack Paar and Johnny Carson, we suspect America is waking up to the fact that they don’t have to watch the mostly unfunny Leno if they don’t want to.  Our recommendation, get new writers or get off the air. 10pm is for hospital or courtroom dramas. (more…)

The Glory of 3D

12/07/09 - Posted by Abdullah Saeed under Hot Topics

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The Story: The Football World Cup will be broadcasted in 3D.  Here are some other areas that should hop on the multi-dimensional bandwagon.

The Search: 3D

3D has made a comeback. Kids animated movies have revived this ‘medium of the future’, as have a couple of superhero movies that were pretty awful, but it’s certainly not 3D’s fault! 3D is awesome! It’s like having the movie play out slightly closer to you than is actually the case. There’s bright colors and enough things flying at your face to make you cry, if you’re a small child.

Organizers of the Football World Cup (the foot game, not the good kind) have seen what 3D can do for watchables and have decided to broadcast the final in…3D!  Fans around the world can participate, and while they might look stupid with those glasses on, the experience is priceless.  So where else would we like to see 3D enhancement? You can probably bet that we’re gonna tell you.

The News
American 24 hour news has long abandoned substance as its cornerstone. That’s why we hear a lot about Tiger Woods being in a low speed car accident and not about numerous deadly occurrences all around the world. It’s just as well, because if we’re watching in 3D, we’d rather see some stock footage of golf swings than of bodies riddled with bullets. C’mon CNN; you had Will.I.Am live via hologram last year, you can afford 3D.

(more…)

Jon & Kate’s Expiration Date

11/24/09 - Posted by Evan Kessler under Hot Topics

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Yesterday, the half-hour-long child exploitation-athon known as Jon and Kate Plus 8 took it’s final bow on TLC. On the bright side, when the Gosselin kids want to recall their childhood trauma in therapy years later, all they have to do is pop on season 4 disc 2 and watch it with their analyst. While we, the viewing public, will always have our memories of the early years of the Gosselin kids, after 5 seasons and 116 episodes, it’s now time to move on. The show’s loyal legion of viewers will have to find something better to do than watch eight children have tea parties, or mill around aimlessly while their parents argue, angle for sponsorships, and scar them for life by filming their every move.  We have a few ideas to help these fans fill the 30 minute Gosselin void:

screen-shot-2009-11-24-at-50834-pmExercise- The American Heart Association recommends that all adults get at least 30-minutes of physical activity each day. Now’s your chance America. Enroll in a spin class or better yet, Jazzercise!

Make Sweet Love- The average lovemaking session lasts 15 minutes. Why not try to be above average by trying to occupy the 30-minutes previously taken up by Jon & Kate with a bit of romance…or you know, just go twice. You might end up having a “plus eight” of your own. (more…)

My Little 90’s Flashback

11/16/09 - Posted by Abdullah Saeed under Hot Topics

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The Story: Hasbro is giving My Little Pony a magical revival.  OneRiot has some perfect pony ideas of our own.

The Search: My Little Pony

When it comes to what kids want, no one has their finger on the pulse like Hasbro. Whether it’s because they’re just that perceptive or they’re brainwashing our children, Hasbro’s effectiveness is now manifesting itself in the revival of forgotten things and a ridiculous amount of merchandising (I’m writing this article while wearing my Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen bedroom slippers and tiara combo). With all the action-packed remakes catering to little boys with ADD and internet access, Hasbro has decided to pick up the slack with product lines targeted at little girls. With interests of that demographic going in a generally inappropriate direction, the toy giant is revisiting a more wholesome time, when girls dreamed of multicolored stallions with big spikes growing out of their faces. My Little Pony is coming back to TV and there’s nothing any of us can do about it.

With the new show and subsequent toy line on the horizon, we have been pondering which tactics Hasbro will be using to maintain the magic and fantasy while simultaneously keeping costs down and bolstering their profit margin. Naturally, being the on-the-fly thinkers we are, we came up with a few ideas of our own.
(more…)

“Survivor” Contestant Dies During Filming

6/01/09 - Posted by Evan Kessler under Hot Topics

Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. Subjecting relatively normal human beings to extreme physical challenges in ridiculous, nutrition deprived conditions as they desperately make alliances can’t always end in champagne wishes and caviar dreams. Sure, it all sounds entertaining and harmless, but as the popular saying goes, “it’s all fun and games until someone has a heart attack and dies.”

That is exactly what happened on the set of a reality show that unfortunately wasn’t VH1’s “I Love Money”. Noncho Vodenicharov, a 53-year old former stuntman, singer, and Mayor had the utter misfortune to lose his life during the filming of Bulgaria’s version of the popular reality show Survivor.

“It’s all fun and games until someone has a heart attack and dies.”

While details are a bit fuzzy, odds are the victim had just finished swimming three miles after days of little nourishment and/or sleep in attempts to win immunity to save all of the members of his alliance from being voted off. With Noncho’s passing, no one is quite sure who will be booted at the next tribal council meeting, since Vodenicharov had totally promised everyone he had their backs. For more information on this story… watch this youtube clip and learn to speak Bulgarian.

American Idol Winner // Sorry, Mashable… You Predicted the Loser

5/20/09 - Posted by Carmel Hagen under How to Use the Realtime Web, Industry

Earlier today, Mashable posted a great article that casually predicted Adam Lambert as winner of tonight’s American Idol finale. The authors of the post didn’t use a crystal ball to come to that conclusion, rather the increasingly buzzy methodology behind search trend analyzation. This process uses things like geography and search frequency to predict social behaviors, and has shown an exciting amount of promise, particularly for people in areas like marketing or politics.

In this particular case, the authors tracked search trends by region to gauge interest in both Adam Lambert and Kris Allen, and their findings seemed to imply that because people were searching more for Lambert, his fans could likely depend on him stealing the golden microphone. However, fans this side of Universal Studios (read: OneRiot’s intensely masculine, pop rock-ridiculing, ‘Kill Your TV’ search team (cough)) begged to differ. Instead of looking solely at searches, our team was watching what people were actually saying about Idol’s two final contestants on the realtime web - and they seemed to be telling a different story.

Check out the above graph, which tracks social media mentions of both Lambert and Allen over the time period around their last performance. Instead of tracking the total number of mentions, this chart tracks the proportion of mentions in respect to each individual’s average fan traffic on the social web. While at times Lambert does appear to be inching ahead of Allen and vice versa, they are by most accounts neck-and-neck.

This is an interesting graph, but much like a general search trend analysis it is somewhat incomplete. When people search for or share something online, you can fairly assume that they are at least interested in the subject. What you can’t assume is why they are interested in it, because just knowing that someone searched for something won’t always tell you what they were hoping to find. Likewise, just because someone shares something online doesn’t always mean they care about it - in fact, it might just mean they’re talking crap.

So, what’s in a search? A lot of things, and getting to the bottom of them is tricky. Did people search more for Adam because they intend to vote for him, or were they simply hunting down more info on the more sensationalist of the two singers? Without getting inside the collective brains of America, It’s nearly impossible to say. Thankfully, “What’s in a social media mention?” is a question we can answer just by digging a little deeper.

In the graph above, you’ll notice that Kris Allen seems to be faring better than Adam Lambert (Allen fans, go get your high fives on). What you’re looking at is a filtered graph of positive social signals surrounding each candidate, meaning this accounts for not only for mentions of either candidate on places like Twitter and OneRiot, but also for the sentiments behind those mentions. Overall, while people seem to talk about both candidates equally as much (as indicated by the first graph), it looks like they’re much more likely to talk favorably about Kris Allan, using words like “love” and “must win.” Predictably, this indicates that they will really vote for him in the final battle.

In other words - remember all those searches for Adam Lambert? They might not mean that much, because the actual sentiment of the social web is predicting a different winner. Of course, we’ll have to wait a few more hours to find out, but until then - our money’s on Allen.

With Regretable Irony, a Drama Director Drops Dead

5/01/09 - Posted by Christopher Reinhard under Hot Topics

In what many are calling the most ironic curtain call in recent history, NBC vice president of drama Nora O’Brien literally (not theatrically) dropped dead on set yesterday. In a gravely serious press conference, NBC execs announced that O’Brien would be severely missed. At the time of her death, O’Brien was working on the set of ‘Parenthood,’ a lively new drama based on a 1989 film of the same name. She’d been making a killing at the network for six years.

We swear on our lives that everyone at OneRiot sends their condolences to Nora O’Brien’s family and friends. But to NBC: please don’t cancel Must See TV this week; without a new episode of The Office we would just die.

(I am so sorry for writing this.)

Guiding Light Going Dark

4/01/09 - Posted by Christopher Reinhard under Hot Topics

While millions of Americans eagerly await the answers that lie within the elusive series finale of Lost, literally trillions more breathed a sad sigh of relief today when CBS announced that the last episode of the world’s longest running television program, Guiding Light, will take place in September of 2009.

The daytime soap began that began as a fifteen-minute serial in 1937 has riveted pretty much every housewife since its inception with stories following the Bauers—and their children, and grandchildren and great grandchildren—as they struggled with life in that crazy little town of Springfield. In its 72-year history, Guiding Light has fostered careers for a laundry list of budding young stars including Kim Zimmer, Monti Sharp and household name Jordi Vilasuso. Needless to say, the primetime ratings are in for a real jostling come autumn.

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